Today, as I made my way home after a successful trip to Costco, I was stopped on the highway by a proud member of out local police force. Here is an actual transcript from that event: Police Officer (looking very self-satisfied): Well! I've been sitting here all morning waiting for you! Me (looking even more smug and self satisfied): Well! I got here as fast as I could! End Scene.
And that, dear friends, is how you get your sorry ass out of a speeding ticket.