For the most part, being socially awkward is a stigma. The media stereotype depicts it as someone who lacks self-confidence, reads a lot of manga, lives in a basement and takes yearly trips to Comic Con. But is being awkward necessarily a bad thing? According to today's media, I would say absolutely not. In fact, awkward comedies are this past decade's fundamental source of humor. Think of the title characters in "The 40-Year-Old Virgin", "Zoolander"... basically any character on The Office.
While we've all found ourselves in horrifying social situations in which something occurs unexpectedly, I have always personally felt the feelings that result from not being able to recover from the awkwardness that ensues can have their benefits. Lucky for you, I have spent a good portion of my life staring moments like those square in the eye, and know that, in my soul of souls, this is what makes me who I am and - Goddammit!- I'm good with it.
Here are a few choice examples of awkward moments that I played out personally. Some effed me up for days afterwards. Several have made me want to quit the earth immediately afterwards experiencing them. And, sadly, a few may be familiar to you. If so? Welcome to the tribe!
- My daughter corrected me recently whilst helping with her math homework. She is in the 3rd grade.
- After a hearing a great track in a film we were watching, I spontaneously predicted that the song was "gonna be huge". My husband turned to me and revealed that the song I was hearing was Goodbye Stranger by Supertramp.
- I fell up the stairs at Massey Hall after a concert. I had drunk water all night.
- I laughed at a joke about oral sex while watching a film with my 65 year old mother.
- I realized too late that I had been imitating the accent of an English friend. Poorly. Yes, she was in the room with me at the time.
- I frequently have to hold up the index and thumb of both of my hands in order to determine right and left.
- I had a conversation with a woman at a barbeque who was breastfeeding her 6 year old.
- I sat on a friends leather couch during a heat wave and then had to explain that I wasn't farting every time I moved.
- I referred to a woman who I have worked out with for going on 4 years now, "Erin" when her name was actually "Emily.
- I referred to a hockey player as an "Arse Wipe" to someone who was wearing his signed jersey.
- In order to get out of sidewalk conversation with someone I didn't want to talk to in the first damned place, I concocted a story about meeting a friend. I ran into them 5 minutes later in the butcher shop.
- The hygienist asked me a question while I her hand was in my mouth. I drooled on it by way of reply.
- My daughter asked me once why I always whispered for people to "Slow the puck down!" while we were driving. I told her it was playoff season and I was thinking about hockey.
- I checked myself out in the window of a parked car only to realize that there was someone inside.
I could go on for days here. I'm gonna stop now.